Do we ultimately, subconsciously forbid ourselves from the things we want the most?

It’s fire. It’s fire spreading through your brain, burning all inhibitions and mental restrictions. Fire spreads quickly and fiercely. And before you know it, it’s burning your entire body and soul. The forbidden, the restricted, the denied, the impossible, the unknown. What is it that makes the prohibited sweet like ambrosia? Why do we often deny ourselves the things we want the most? Why do we feel compelled to follow personal rules and protocols regarding unexpected situations? Why do we pretend to be shocked by the things we create ourselves?

Once our conscious mind becomes somehow interested in something/someone that we aren’t meant to have, our subconscious becomes the holder of this information as we unconsciously try to create barriers that honour an specific code of conduct that from one’s perspectives, SEEMS right; often based on the way a person was brought up and the idealistic views of one’s parents/authority figures and environment.

Yet, over and over, we repeat the same pattern; and the more we repeat it, the more intense it gets. We create multiple rules and protocols that somewhat dictate the way we should react to specific situations. So, as if ironically, we throw ourselves into the very circumstances we denied ourselves, and when confronted with such scenario, temptation dances around our hips like street Kizomba dancers. There is some type of sweetness in the forbidden, I believe ambrosia, the food  of the Gods, is made out of temptation, restriction and sin. That’s probably why only Gods are able to indulge in it. It controls the very element of life in all its force. Joy. Thrill. High.

Debauchery. Such a beautiful word. Perhaps my new favourite. “The excessive indulgence of sex, alcohol or drugs”, according to Google. Yet, so much darkness attached to this word like a heavy stigma-crucifix. There is a price to pay for the enjoyment of this word. Most people in this society, those who live and thrive within the multiple prefabricated boxes of the system would frown upon such activities. But do they know what they are missing? Do they know?

When lust is part of the forbidden equation, there is a unique exotic flavour. The very denied transforms into the very reward for breaking the rules and ignoring restrictions. The heavily-built protocols become obsolete as desire, curiosity and danger mix to make the perfect recipe for heaven.

 

I think they were wrong, there is fire with the angels in heaven. And it’s cold, very cold in hell.